It's that time of year again. The holidays are fast approaching and, for me, that means it's the season of list-making. And while I'm certainly not the only person that utilizes lists more frequently this time of year, I imagine I'm probably one of the most neurotic list makers you might encounter in your lifetime. Don't believe me? Read on, dear friends.
For a little background, I learned years ago that I can easily become overwhelmed when there's a lot to do and that a great way to keep the anxiety from taking over my entire life is to make a list. I discovered that, more often than not, it wasn't the amount of things on my list that caused me stress, but the fear of something falling through the cracks. As I write things down, my brain no longer feels the need to retain ALL the details and, while things certainly pop in my mind that need to be remembered, as long as I add them to my list, it doesn't add to my stress level. I can handle pages and pages of tasks... what I can't handle, apparently, is the fear of forgetting something entirely.
I'm not sure about anyone else, but my stress hits me in two very distinct ways. The first is physical pain in my neck and shoulders. The second is that I don't sleep well and have crazy dreams... and I mean CRAZY.
When it comes to neck and shoulder pain, I like to use it as an opportnity to treat myself to a massage. It literally does nothing for my stress level, but it sure does feel good. When it comes to having bad dreams about really odd things, however, the only solution is to sit down and make a list of everything I need to do. Once it's all on paper, I find I'm no longer worried about missing something... if it's on my list, it'll get done.
So, last night was one of those crazy dream nights. And I'm not talking about scary nightmares of monsters under my bed... it's so much weirder than that. Get ready for a glimpse into an unhinged brain...
In last night's dream, I found myself running incredibly late to get my son to school (I don't take him to school and I'm literally never late for anything, so we're off to a good start). We finally get in the car so I can take him to some random place on a hill where the bus picks him up, but I realize that, even though I've made the trip a million times, I suddenly can't remember how to get there (okay, this detail checks out... I use GPS to get everywhere!). I miss a turn, I panic, my son panics, we're all a hot panicky mess. Somehow I manage to find my way back on the right road and we make it to our destination, miraculously with time to spare. As we wait for the bus, I set down a plastic bag of incredibly important papers (because who doesn't keep their important documents in an old plastic grocery bag... and why I didn't just leave it in my car is a mystery). Once the bus arrives, I turn around to pick up my bag and find that it's nowhere to be seen. I'm once again in a panic, turning around in circles and looking all over for my missing bag. Next thing I know, I'm surrounded on all sides with a plethora of plastic bags of all shapes and sizes and, try as I might, I cannot find the one that belongs to me. The bags seem to duplicate as if I'm in some kind of cartoonish garbage dump and I discover there are strangers all around trying to keep me calm and help me find my bag. They're asking reasonable questions like "What was in your bag?" and "What kind of bag was it?" in an effort to help me locate it, but I find them all to be frustrating and useless. I suddenly realize that I don't remember exactly what was in the bag other than the clear understanding that the contents are super important. I'm crying and frustrated and losing my ever-loving mind. And then I wake up.
I'm no dream analyst, but I do have a pretty clear picture of what I'm dealing with here: important things I can't remember, a whole lot of baggage, and time as a stressor... you don't need Scooby and his friends at Mystery, Inc. to solve this one. I know myself well enough to know that, unless I want to revisit this delightful trash heap again tonight, it's time for me to update my To Do list: schedule holiday gatherings, update address list, finish writing blog post... check, check, check.
While I'm a lover of lists all year round, I have several that are essential this time of year:
There's the obvious holiday shopping list. If you have kids, it's a wish list of every high quality (insert eye roll here) gadget they see on tv... oh, how I loathe toy commercials. If you have a large family, your list may be all of the people you need to remember to find a gift for. Whether it's gift cards for your mailman and hairstylist or making Aunt Trudy her annual fruitcake, there are always people you need to remember this time of year.
Then there's the mailing list. Whether you spend time with them regularly or only see them once a decade, every single person you've ever met is set to receive some kind of holiday card. I skip this one every couple of years because, let's face it, it's just a lot of work. And with the cost of stamps these days... good grief!
Don't forget the grocery list. If you're hosting a gathering during the holiday season, this is likely a lengthy one. With any luck, you're fortunate enough to just be attending someone else's gathering and all you need to bring is a dish to share. Either way, the grocery store is always a fun place to hang out during the holidays (more eye rolling here).
And somewhere in there is a 'don't-forget-before-the-end-of-the-year' list. This one may be my least favorite because it's all the annoying things we don't want to deal with during an already busy time. Things like reviewing your insurance records to see if you've met your deductible... because, if you have, you need be sure to schedule every doctor's appointment you can into this 4-week window. Going on a road trip to visit family? Don't forget to get your oil changed. Want to support your favorite charity so you can claim a deduction in 4 months? Be sure to make your charitable donations by December 31st.
The point is, there is no shortage of lists in my house. The real question, however, isn't WHETHER you keep a list (because is there anyone that doesn't?!?), but HOW do you keep your list?
There are so many options available, it's hard to keep track. In times like these, I find it's best to make a list (you see what I did there?!?). The trick, however, isn't just to make a list... it's to find the best list for YOU. For me, I've actually found that different kinds of lists work better for different things. Don't hesitate to try them all until you find the ones that make the most sense for how you live your life.
Whether you're a fan of Post-Its, Pinterest or the basic punch list, there's a list option out there that's right for everyone!
Written Lists: This is the most straightforward and basic way to keep track of all your to-dos. For myself, I've found this option works best for short-term things like groceries or what I need to remember for that specific day. The main reason for this is that it's too easy to lose a piece of paper. Post-its are great for reminders I can keep on my desk and a grocery list can be put in my purse and get tossed once the task is accomplished, but unless the list is going to generally stay in one place for short-term purposes, I don't find it to be an effective way to keep track of too many things.
Digital Lists: If you're the kind of person that has their phone with them every second of the day, there are tons of apps that provide list-making solutions. I've tried a few, but found the most comprehensive to be the Alexa app, which connects to any Alexa device and an Amazon account. While it includes tons of automated options for placing Amazon orders, I find the most useful tool to be its Shopping List. We keep an Amazon Echo in our kitchen and regularly give it verbal commands to add items to our shopping list. Then, when we're at the store, we simply open the shopping list on the app and everything is there, already sorted by category, making it easy to find what we need. As items are added to your cart, you click the checkbox next to the item and it moves to the bottom of your list and out of the way.
Wish Lists: While there's no shortage of to-do lists in my life, some of my favorite lists are those that aren't essential, but are instead for fun and creativity. On my Alexa app, I also keep a list of home projects. They're not necessarily things we 'need' to do, but rather things we'd like to do if and when our circumstances permit. Whether we plan to get started soon or need to save up for a few years, it's fun to start putting together ideas so that, when you're ready, you have everything in order. This is where apps like Pinterest and Houzz come into play. These kinds of apps allow you to collect links and images into idea boards for easy access at a later time. For example, on Pinterest, I have boards for vacation ideas, recipes, haircuts I like, home remodeling projects, and so much more. Houzz is great too, but is designed specifically for home and design projects while Pinterest can be for literally anything.
Vision Boards: Speaking of creativity... while not exactly the same as a list, it can certainly accomplish the same goal if you're more of a visual person. While it's not something you'd use for daily tasks, this is a great way to visualize a bigger project. For example, let's say you're redecorating a room. You could certainly make a list of all the the things you need to get: curtains, paint, rug, décor, couches, tables, etc.), but if you're more of a visual person, a vision board could be a better solution. Find images of things you like, paint swatches from your local hardware store for color palette ideas and pictures of rooms you want to use for inspiration. Seeing it all come together allows you to visualize the finished room more clearly and help you when it comes to deciding exactly what to purchase.
List of Lists: Okay, I know this one sounds a little crazy, but stick with me for a moment. When it comes to my personal lists, I use a combination of all of the above. When it comes to work, however, I find that the digital lists work best. But even my digital lists need to stay organized. I have to-do lists related to several different categories of my job and I bounce between them multiple times throughout my day. I have found that, rather than trying to combine everything into one list or having several separate lists, my best option has been, essentially, a list of lists. There are several options out there, but I loved Trello from the moment I found it and have never looked back. Basically, it's all online, works on a computer and smartphone, and feels like the best possible combination of checklists, post-it notes and a paper calendar. It even works for collaborating with others. And because this is my favorite kind of list, I'm going to provide a little deep-dive in a future post about how you can use Trello for any household list you can think of. Stay tuned for that one! (UPDATE: you can find it here!)
The hard thing about lists is that there's no right or wrong way to make them... they just need to work for you. I'd encourage you to try different kinds of lists for different tasks and see what makes the most sense for your lifestyle. Here are some pointers to get you started:
1. Consider each of your lists separately as you may find, like me, that not every list type fits every situation. Pick one to start with and consider all of the different ways you can create that list. For example, your mailing list might be able to be kept as a written address book or a digital address book, but it probably won't work well utilizing post-it notes or a dry erase board. Likewise, creating a digital file for a simple list of tasks you hope to accomplish in a day (i.e. shop for groceries, wash the bed sheets and take the dog for a walk) may not be the most effective.
2. Pick one list to start with and create a starter list using each format that you think will be most effective. When I say 'starter list' I simply mean you do not have to create the fully finished list in multiple formats... it really depends on how detailed that list will end up. Using the mailing list example, if you have more than 100 contacts, it would not be a very good use of your time to create both a paper and digital address book with all of those contacts. You could start with just a small section of the alphabet so that you can see how each would come together and, after some time of using both, determine which format better suits your needs. If you're working with something smaller like a grocery list, you may want to take each list format for a test drive, utilizing a written list one week and a list in an app another. Test out all options, maybe more than once, to see which one you like best. Side note: if more than one person does the shopping in your household, consider an app that allows multi-person access so that you can both add and check off items.
3. Take your time to truly consider your options before deciding on one. You can most certainly change your mind on simple things like daily to-do lists without much effort. But if you decide to invest in an adorable address book and spend hours writing in all of your contacts, you don't want to change your mind three months down the road and have to enter them all into a digital file of some kind.
Now, for a few TO DO LIST pro tips:
1. Don't be afraid to add items to your list just so you can check them off. It's essential in any project to be able to track progress... the crossing off of any item on a list is good for your mental health.
2. On busy days, don't hesitate to leave your completed TO DO LIST out for others to see. It's good for your ego for others to see how hard you work.
3. On days when it doesn't feel like you accomplished much at all, feel free to toss that list and start over the next day. Life is hard and we all deserve a break. And if you simply must have a list, pour yourself a glass of wine and take some time to make a list of all you have to be thankful for.
Cheers, friends, to a wonderful list-making... I mean holiday... season.
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